Thursday, January 04, 2007

Little Purr-Vert

Have you seen this cat?

This beautiful orange cat is named Little and he is approximately three years old. He is mostly orange with just a trace of white along the bridge of his nose and the tip of his tail. He is wanted for various crimes against purr-sons and other cats, too! He was last seen in Annie's closet.

Count One: Being a Purr-Vert

Little, A.K.A., Little Slugger, Little Man, Little Purr-vert, Little Troublemaker, and Widdle, has a very strong foot fetish and is known for attacking innocent feet and chewing on toes. His MO is stalking, lying-in-wait, and pouncing on his victims' feet when least expected. Although these purr-versions have caused no serious injuries to date, he has been known to make Annie emit blood-curdling yells that have caused serious alarm through-out the shelter, being as how our ears are quite sensitive to such unwelcome sounds.

Count Two: Being a Peeping Tom

Widdle also stands accused of hiding in bathrooms, skulking behind shower curtains, and spying from his perch within private dressing areas. Being the Little Slugger that he is, he has also been charged with repeatedly standing just outside our litter boxes, swatting at us as we go in or out, making a huge nuisance of himself and affording no-one an ounce of privacy.

Count Three: Being a Cat Burglar

Little Man lurks on dressers, countertops, and bookshelves, stealing miscellaneous knick knacks and souvenirs. Missing is one orange sock, a sterling silver ID bracelet, and a broken Timex watch.

Reward Information

If you have seen this cat, please contact Annie as soon as possible. We cats have gotten together to offer the following Reward for any information which leads to his capture:

1. One half-bald toy mouse.

2. A giant fur-ball that Annie missed while cleaning.

3. Complete "Miracle Cat Ear-Cleaning Kit"

4. Brand-New "Going to the Vet" Cat Carrier.

Annie said that when the Little Purr-vert is found, he is facing a maximum sentence of Life Without the Possibility of Purr-ole.

Of course, since us cats are famous for having nine lives, we reckon that the world won't have seen the last of our Little Troublemaker for a long, long time to come.